Yayāti, Devayānī, Śarmiṣṭhā, and the Exchange of Youth: The Unsatisfied Nature of Desire
तं वीरमाहौशनसी प्रेमनिर्भरया गिरा । राजंस्त्वया गृहीतो मे पाणि: परपुरञ्जय ॥ २० ॥ हस्तग्राहोऽपरो मा भूद् गृहीतायास्त्वया हि मे । एष ईशकृतो वीर सम्बन्धो नौ न पौरुष: ॥ २१ ॥
taṁ vīram āhauśanasī prema-nirbharayā girā rājaṁs tvayā gṛhīto me pāṇiḥ para-purañjaya
With words brimming with love, Devayānī said: “O King, conqueror of hostile cities! By taking my hand, you have accepted me as your wife. Let no other touch my hand; O hero, this bond between us is ordained by the Lord, not wrought by human might.”
While taking Devayānī out of the well, King Yayāti must certainly have appreciated her youthful beauty, and therefore he might have asked her which caste she belonged to. Thus Devayānī would have immediately replied, “We are already married because you have accepted my hand.” Uniting the hands of the bride and bridegroom is a system perpetually existing in all societies. Therefore, as soon as Yayāti accepted Devayānī’s hand, they could be regarded as married. Because Devayānī was enamored with the hero Yayāti, she requested him not to change his mind and let another come to marry her.
This verse highlights pāṇi-grahaṇa—accepting the bride’s hand—as the recognized act of marriage, spoken here by Devayānī to Yayāti.
After Yayāti accepted her in marriage, Devayānī—moved by love—openly acknowledged the bond and addressed him with honor as a heroic king.
Treat committed relationships as sacred responsibilities—honor promises, speak with respect, and recognize that bonds carry dharmic duties, not merely emotion.