Shloka 2.12.12
द्वादशः सर्गः — Kaikeyi’s Boons and Dasaratha’s Moral Collapse (Ayodhya Kanda 12)
परा भवति मे प्रीतिर्दृष्ट्वा तनयमग्रजम्।।।।अपश्यतस्तु मे रामं नष्टा भवति चेतना।
kinnu me yadi vā svapnaś cittamoho 'pi vā mama | anubhūtopasargo vā manaso vāpy upadravaḥ ||
“What is this for me—could it be a dream, or a delusion of the mind, or some impending calamity I am about to undergo, or else a disturbance afflicting my mind?”
When I see my firstborn , I experience supreme delight. But if I do not see him, mylife loses its meaning.
The verse highlights self-examination under crisis: before acting, one must discern whether one’s perception is clouded by delusion or fear. Dharma begins with clarity of mind and truthful assessment of one’s situation.
Daśaratha, shaken by Kaikeyī’s harsh stance and demands, reacts with disbelief and anxiety, wondering whether he is facing an unreal or ominous turn of events.
Daśaratha’s vulnerability and honesty: he openly admits confusion and dread rather than masking his mental turmoil.